The Death of Late Night TV?

Full disclosure: I fall quite solidly on the side of Team Conan in the midst of this whole NBC debacle. To be more specific, I fall on Team "Conan, Craig Ferguson, Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert Should Host One Mega-Show because 10 p.m. to 1 a.m. is my Chief Productivity Time and They End to Own All of It, Especially When I'm Procrastinating."

But, at the same time, I'm having difficulty getting worked up about it. Maybe it's because I'm not actually in America right now, but I think it's more likely that this situation repeats a whole bunch of "news" that everyone familiar with late-night television already knows. Namely:

1. Jay Leno is unfunny, self-important and in possession of far more television clout than his talent should actually warrant.

2. Conan O'Brien was way funnier when he was in a timeslot that actually allowed him to be quirky and inappropriate.

3. My dog, the much-beloved Fatters, could do a better job of running a network than what's-his-face who's in charge over at NBC right now.

4. Late night TV is not that exciting. Yes, there are some amusing hosts. But there are also a lot of navel-gazing interviews, recycled and mildly offensive jokes, and nothing but white men in leadership positions.

I certainly don't mean to wish ill upon my fellow pale, scrawny, red-head, but is anyone really surprised that three solid hours of same-old, same-old late-night television proved to be a terrible broadcasting decision for NBC? (And, yes, I include Conan's show in that "same-old, same-old" category; as much as I enjoy his humor-although I don't feel he's responsible for the decidedly demure nature of his stint on "The Tonight Show.")

I'm just suggesting that, maybe if they actually provided something that couldn't be found at the same time on, oh, nearly every other channel, they wouldn't have to be grubbing for ratings and doing Jay Leno's bidding.

Yes, watching clips of Conan and Letterman's snark about the situation and comparing their scathing wit to Leno's lack thereof has been exciting and all, I guess. But imagine if, I don't know, Amy Sedaris or Tracy Morgan (not that I ever want Tracy Morgan to leave my Thursday nights) or Mindy Kaling had a nightly opportunity to throw their input into the mix-how great would that be?

Answer: Infinitely more interesting and amusing than, "I like fancy cars!"

Not only would their comedy definitely be more interesting, it would be, in my mind, legitimately awesome and creative and new-in the same way that Conan was on his much-missed "Late Night," in the way Craig Ferguson currently is in that time slot on CBS.

But even better, because it could actually set a totally new standard for late-night comedy rather than just pushing the boundaries of the old standards. And, maybe my modernism class is just haunting my subconscious, but what better time to set a new standard than after a period of intense turmoil, in which everything has been broken down?

But, all things considered, I would settle for Jay Leno just not being on my television anymore. Seriously.